THE ABUSIVE ADDICTIVE CYCLE OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
It's an addiction like any other and it needs rehabilitation; as though you are treating drugs and alcohol.
A good start is raising awareness of the problem; you'll be surprised how many people have accepted abuse to be the norm, part of their marriage/lives and like an infection that's gone untreated, it spreads rapidly.
The next step would be Fund Raising; and the best approach with such a topic is face to face. Domestic Violence is something that seems to be taken lightly in this country, it's almost a duty of care to their husbands, to be of service under any circumstances and it may also be a cultural defect; however, I take a different view.
Before we go any further, lets define domestic violence:
1. Physical Abuse – Assault, Etc...
2. Emotional Abuse – Verbal Put Downs, Neglect, Etc...
3. Mental Abuse – Deception, Defamation, Threats, Etc...
4. Financial Abuse – Withholding Income Etc...
5. Social Abuse – Isolation, Jealousy Etc...
One could argue that men may also be affected (and I'm not disputing that), however, in a patriarchal society, it's the women that are pushing shit up-hill and in terms of matching force for force, are definitely the underdogs (and I am generalizing to cut a long story short).
Step Three is a Providing a Place of Safety; Whether he goes or she does, safety has to happen to enable the affected to move forward free of violence. In Australia (and this is coming from someone with direct experience), I've heard so many women in refuges express how unhappy they are having to flee the family home and uproot their kids, when he is the perpetrator and therefore, he should have been made to leave. Yes, I would have to agree to that but in dire circumstances, where he is returning back to the family home making death threats (and intervention orders aren't effective without evidence taking into consideration the time lag involved in police attendance) it's probably better to make the sacrifice and start again elsewhere just for the peace of mind if nothing else.
Step four is Counseling; this is tricky because a counselor who does not specialize in Domestic Violence can very quickly give you a referral to be seen by a doctor who may administer medication – and IF THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU, SO NO, as it could very well give you a problem that wasn't there to begin with.
Domestic Violence is not a mental illness it's an emotional deficiency (for example, if you have a low self-esteem, etc...) and an addiction like any other, medication does not fix it!!!
Step five is Support; This is where support groups are affective in listening and contributing by way of communication so everyone understands you are not alone and not crazy – it's the stepping stone to re-building your sense of self worth.
Step SIX is Rehabilitation; All the above mentioned are a waste of time if you are just going to run to a temporary place of safety and make some friends along the way, just to leave and attract the same issue in different colored pants. Rehabilitation for Domestic Violence costs money and it not prioritized in terms of Government Funding, which is just as dangerous as drugs and alcohol.
STEP SEVEN IS INDEPENDANCE!